Optimist, sunshine, nature, apples, clouds, animals, walking, being me, air-rifle, sketching, music, laughing with friends, reading, living each day to the fullest
'On ne voit bien qu'avec le cœur. L'essentiel est invisible pour les yeux.

bolditalicunderlinestrikeout

It’s a good and bad thing being bombarded by gadgets in our daily lives. These sources of information can be good, because it makes you a more informed person, and sometimes (or most of the times) it can truly be damn annoying.

The first prize of wenying-wants-to-throw-you-away-in-a-far-far-far-far-away-land would be MY HANDPHONE!

While eating dinner just now, my left hand was holding onto my phone, my right hand holding onto my empty spoon, and my eyes were fixated on km, geography. My mind was about watching geography plate tectonics video, and thinking about how much time I have left for the day to study for the subjects I need to catch up (comprises everything) and study for chemistry test dated, tomorrow. There are truly so many things you want to do in one minute. And on my left hand, due to some glitches faced by my phone, my inbox flooded with smses, from juniors, from relays, from shooters, from this from that. One the one hand, I wanted to reply to everything. On the other, my mom was watching me and asking me to stop using my phone and eat my dinner. BUT I think I’m out of time! Yet, multi-tasking like that also reduces my efficiency. I gave up, blacked my laptop screen, flipped my hand phone so that I will not see the blinking screen and silenced my phone as its pervasive reminders are damn annoying.

I dislike being over reliant on technology. I’m not sure if I’m over reliant on it though, but what I’m sure is that it takes up my free time.

I am a busy person. Busy.

(oh I just realized I have forgotten to reply to jaqueline’s message!)

Here’s a preview of what my today:

600- wake up

630-get fetched to school in dad’s car

700-school, waiting to tap my thumbprint and then wanting to get started with work. (sometimes I would waste time talking to friends, not really sure if its wasting time, but daddy considers it. Maybe he doesn’t know what life of a student is, how can we live without any social connections, hello? But with hindsight, talking to your friends at the start of the day may not be an especially bad thing afterall. If I work out trends about my happiness level, being with these friends make me happy sometimes)

800-CHEM

900-BREAK (and trying to understand what mrs yeo was saying, and asking hong questions)

1000-GEOG

1100-GP

1230-BREAK

100-MATH LECTURE (mr tan’s was the MOST BORING LECTURER ON EARTH. His voice is uber droning, I really can doze off. I wrote rubbish that didn’t make sense on my notes (because after lecture, you read and you cannot understand what you wrote). I was kept awake by hong’s orange lollipop.

200-biology tutorial

300-PE

400-Exco meeting (like AGAIN.) and 4x100 heats.

530-Way to safra

630-Safra, training

900-ended training, and dad fetched me back home.

930-dinner

1000-now.

Today I reflected on a lot of things. Mostly after school, on bus trips, because that’s when you are most free to do anything that doesn’t require writing.

I just wanted to let you know, dear, that….

I somewhat felt empty when I was waiting for your reply. Because I’m quite used to getting a quick reply from you usually, but today was unlike other days. It could be because of the glitch my phone has experienced, or that you could have been busy with other things, but what I felt and I believe what you felt after that was: emo, and starting to think- overcomplexify.

So, that was what happened to me on the bus. I thought that you could be mad at me for don’t know what reasons… Most ridiculous ones that occurred to be was, your NJ friend has saw that I was talking to this boy and people who love making stories, said that we are ahem and blahblahblah, but he has a girlfriend already. I believe in platonic friendships.

So I also thought about social distancing. What is considered, appropriate and what not. Don’t misunderstand me, I’m not touchy and stuff with guys. But, occasionally after a conversation with a guy, I would feel a little guilty (is this the right word?) or awkward, in a sense that I would wander if you would mind, really. And I would think of ways to avoid…

I feel really appreciative and happy that you are first to message me every morning, sending me something happy, or encouraging. It totally brightens my day, (no wonder you are MY sunshine) :D. but sometimes I think cutting down how we communicate with each other over the hand phone, could be good too….

Sometimes, I feel bad not being able to message you on time, because I’m busy and stuff. I know you mostly wouldn’t mind since you know me very well that my schedule is busy, but sometimes the seeing-your-sms-but-no-time-to-reply-you-thought remains at the back of my mind. It’s a habit I’ve grown into that distracts me, haha.

At times, I feel that not replying to you on time, or giving very short replies makes you moody and sad, which I dislike doing but sometimes I just did. And not receiving from you made me sad for a little while.

Haha, I think we’re really a funny couple. Sometimes, we get depressed over such stuff that happens over the phone and when we get to see each other, yeah nothing that can make us depressed happens.

Sometimes, I feel that being sad over reasons that happen over the phone is not a valid reason to be sad. Why am I being sad over something that I don’t really see, don’t really hear, don’t really know truly. But dependent on how and what somebody write/phrase. I read this somewhere that 38% of what information people receive through sms can be what you really want to express, feelings, words and stuff. Because there is a lack of tonality and facial expressions, and presence of the person, which makes this information… slightly less than what’s authentic .

What I would want to say is that maybe we should cut down on messaging each other, because I feel that the negative effects can affect us both in couple of ways… I prefer talking to you over the phone on some days of the week, because I don’t want (hope) to be too used to seeing your messages.

I’m not sure if this will happen earlier or later, so I was thinking that we can message each other when we are free, not say must everyday.. because I wouldn’t want you to say sorry when both of us cannot sms each other, since you sleep early and I don’t have the time to. Sorry dear!

There are so many things in the way in both our hectic teenage lives that may be obstacles we will face… if we want to stay together. I hope that we can still maintain this great friendship though; it doesn’t matter if we cannot be there for each other all of the time because it will be so based on the current situation.

I really wanted to ring fengwei up just now after training to ask about you, but I wanted to try my phone if it is working or not first, thankfully it was the problem with my phone…

Be assured that I’ll always be here for you to listen and to be your company. :) Tell me and poof i'll appear ! HEHE. I have big goofy dog with flapping ears to send me anywhere.

Sorry for the super long post, I hope it doesn't kill your eyes or boil your blood.

I hope you’ll understand and reply. Or if you don’t we can call and talk.

I love you. :) always.

Shooting was good. Improved.

back to the top?